I am pissed with myself and only myself.
I wished i am a guy because guys have much little friends issues to bother with.
I never knew in my 20 years of life that people have to pretend to like me as a person.
For that i feel so hurt and upset.
But instead of pulling myself away from more people and feeling more emotional about these.
I have decided to step up and regain all that i have lost.
I will attempt my best to contact and reengage with the people that i care.

However, just for these certain lovely people.
I feel so hopeless. Because i no longer feel as though they regard me as a friend.
And even if they allow me into their life again. I doubt they will regard my presence.
I do love each and everyone of them. I guess that why i feel so hurt.
Thrashing out isnt a big thing for this group and thats the last thing i would want to do.
Just a head up, i am no longer the emotional,attitude depression,moodswing girl anymore.
I am recovering so well and my illness is the last thing i will ever want to bother with.
But one thing i learn to do from now on is to know lesser,care lesser about other people and their issues. If i hear no evil. i will say no evil.
Never knew that i was such a bothersome figure in the group.


I swear if i do not meet you guys as promise by the end of sept, i will kill myself.
No kidding man. HEE=D